It was in 1993 at a some very cruxial point of my life ---when one special lap of the race of my life had ended and I was in the still gap of the break-off ... licking my wounds and hurts and trying to overcome the period of first shocks - living from one day to the other.
It was Summer and in my annual holidays having been on my special retreat in a Camping-Trailer on the brink of some little green wilderness with such beautiful beechtrees which I could embrace whenever I felt like ...and I did ...so many evenings I sat there besides them and let go of my hurt feelings and mournings.
And I was given so much help amid this beloved small enclave of mine in which I sensed myself as only another being and creature closely linked to Mother Earth.
I did some special oilpainting over the day - a copy of some illustrious German painter which was a commissioned job - and this was done in a most meditative way in utter stillness ....
And then there was a night when I dreamed a dream - I never forgot - at that time I knew that were some so-called "Great Dreams" given to human beings which at that time anyhow were described as very seldom and rare events in human life !
My Dream or what it was:
There I was with many others on some sort of fleeing from some dark and pressing Danger in an old part of a town which was grey and black with houses appearently being abandoned and all of us were running and trying to get on a train or some sort of streetcar... crowding on it like fleas on some plumtart .... It was a real nightmare - since this I had experienced in the end of WorldWar II in true life - and in this very dream I just took to it as it was a commonly known experience of my ... I just thought: "Again?" - I know I am dreaming but what now again ? ....
Skip this picture !
Suddenly I was standing on a steep hill overlooking some greater valley all surrounded by some steep mountains. Somebody was at my side - I did not turn to look at this Being - I knew it was someone divine - at that time I thought it was God or certainly at least an Angel- as I consciously knew I was in a dream and I did not have to look at God or Angel - fearing all could vanish before my eyes - it was my deep respect and honoring His Presence - something told me not to take a serious look on him - it was just not done not at all at this precise moment - but we talked ( telepathic) and I felt this all-embracing love coming from him to me.
I looked into the valley and saw it was in full Shine ... didn't know whether from sunshine or an inner glow.
It was all Golden-Yellow and the mountains surrounding this valley were of Shining Gold-Yellow ! I was stunned with awe and there was a great joy and delight pervading myself and my heart! I saw and watched and it took my breath away ! To me it seemed as there was a jubilee singing around in this Valley of Gold !
The mountains so shining did not appear to be out of plain gold which is of some harsh and solid constituent but they were as if out of some transparent material - a bit like of glass - that is what I thought then.
Now I know these were Crystal Shining Gold Mountains ... and I remember holding my breath as if I had to drink something so beautiful into my whole body and myself and to hold it there for keepsake.
I knew there was an urge from that "Divine Being" at my side to leave this place as it was not the real and exact time to step down into this Golden Area.
I begged for some more time to stay and said that I wanted to inhale this "Golden Shining Sight" in order to never forget it all my life from then onward.
Then I saw another valley joining like an arm or extension of this one below me and there was a road on which many many people were working and retrieving from the golden mountains the material to produce building bricks from it ..... There was such a hustling and zealous bustling there and all along a road with apple-trees in this Crystal Golden Area....
This is all I was allowed to perceive ....and the very next I found myself on some Fair with stalls and carousels coarsely and vividly painted on their fronts only - just what it is ordinary on a fair where masses of people enjoy themselves....
Yes - this is what I thought "our life is like this now" - and all in my so-called dream - we try to enjoy ourselves among shabby stalles painted coarsely with trivial alike amusements ....
If I had not known better that somewhere else - just a turn of the road away from here - a Golden Shining Crystal Valley was lieing in wait - only a brink away from these coarse entertainments -----
I never forgot this prescious dream which now I know was a soul-journey presented to me as a great gift into the approaching Golden Age.
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This I wanted to share with you all here who are attracted by some alike vibration of myself to read my writings and thoughts.
And So Be it ... Blessings to all of you !
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Later I wrote some Verses on this Deep Experience when I was "out on a limb" but not recognizing it as such .....
Der Traum von den goldenen Bergen
Einst kam ein Traum zu mir des nachts
des Bild mich noch heute glücklich macht :
ich stand am Rande einer grauen Stadt,
sah auf ein Bild, das meines Lebens' Sehnsucht stillt.
I had a dream one night so far
and sheer delight fills me today
there was I standing on the brink
of some grey depth of town so dark
and saw a picture - which all my yearning stilled.
Golden-gelbe Berge breiten sich vor mir aus,
fast durchscheinend werfen sie goldenes Licht hinaus,
erfüllen mich mit nie erlebten Glücksgefühl,
ich halt den Atem an und werd' im Inn'ren still.
Golden-yellow hills steeping on my eyes
throwing out their transparenting golden shine
and fill my heart with awesome golden light!
They take my breath away and go into my Inner Self.
Aller Aufruhr und die Unruh dieses Lebens
entschwand in jenem Augenblick
mein Auge trank sich satt an dieser Schönheit Fest,
mir ward bewußt:
"Dies Bild behalt ich mir für meines Leben's Rest!"
All the turmoil and the unrest of my life
they vanished in that momentum click.
My eyes drank deep this beauty's ball
since I knew then: "this is what I behold
for my living rest!"
Kaum gibt es eine Sprache,
kein Wort vermag zu zeigen.
Es sangen tausend Geigen!
Mein Herz begann zu singen
und erhob mit allen Schwingen
sich auf mit heißem Dank!
Oh mein Gott, wie ist dies schön!
Ich vergess es nie -
mein Leben lang !
Rarely I can find a language,
no speech may show this pic!
When thousand violins were playing!
My heart with joy began its singing
and lifted up with all its wings with
loving thanks.
Oh My God - how is this so filled with beauty!
Which I never lose - forget in all my life !
Ich barg dies Bild als gold'nen Schrein
tief in mein eig'nes inn'res Sein,
bin mir hier stets eingedenk,
dies ist das Licht, das nun mein Leben lenkt.
I hid away this pic as golden shrine
deeply into my very being -
recalling it for me in all my time -
this is the light of my self divine.
Dies trag ich in mir jetzt für alle Zeit,
denk' ich daran, erfüllt mich lichte Kradt,
die in mir wächst und neues Geben schafft.
This I bear now in all realms of life -
recalling it - there's light on me from far,
in ever-growing strength of "Give" anew.
Jetzt weiß ich auch so tief bewußt,
dies Hier ist nur der Vordergrung
in Liebe, Haß und Frust,
getarntes Licht in schweren Schwingen,
so leicht ist es, uns Menschen zu verwirren -
es hat nie aufgehört, in uns zu singen.
Wir sind doch mehr, als wir hier scheinen,
das Licht in uns - es will uns einen .........................
And now this is my knowledge deep and true
"Here"is only view in front with all its Passion, Hate
and not true --- it's
"Light in Camouflage with heavy wings afloat
and so easy to confuse us human beings -"
thereby, there is no end to our hearts so lovely singing...!
We are so much and more than we appear -
the sparkling light in us - it once will join us in the rear...
Was ist das Leben hier am wahren Ende?
Nur Spiegel von mir und grob bemalte Jahrmarktsstände .....
What is life in its true end?
The very mirror of myself and coarsely painted walls of stalls
on Fairs of Humans with so many trivials.
Eva Maria - alias ContraMary 1993
meaning the Eva Maria wrote the original in German 1993
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